Dark Side of Neverland


Never send me to Neverland. It’s filled with souls who refuse to grow up. And boy are we experiencing some growing pains. It hasn’t been our shining week. The principal to whom one of my kids was sent assures me that “it’s all a process.” By that does she mean a process though which I might lose my mind? Then my other kiddo had an altercation which required words with the teacher. Now I know for certain where I have been sent: Never-Lord-of-the-Flies-Land.

In this magical place I am trying to govern with limited success. Here, where mermaids are adored and loin clothes are sported, good spars with evil, yielding an uncertain outcome each and every time. Daily I am left to wonder if civilization and righteousness are taught or inherited?

I look at my son who admittedly makes a darling Peter Pan. Note, I did not choose to share the photo in which he depicts Peter Pan’s death scene, with foam dagger situated across throat and arrow positioned in a rather unfortunate, not to mention sensitive, area. Lord of the Flies indeed.  I wonder about innocence and promise; can they be maintained, and moreover, if they are lost can they be reclaimed?

It’s impossible not to think of my father on this day, which marks three years since his passing. I remember him at his finest– an individual of grace and integrity. He was larger than life, but at some point, as proved by fantastic black-and-white photos he, too, had been young and impressionable, testing personas from cowboy to boy scout. I see my son in those photos, and I see my father in my son. Should he be so lucky to turn his own measure of promise into a life so fulfilled .

I’d love to know if my father had any mischievous moments or perhaps a meeting with the principal? Let’s pretend it was possible, because then I’d have hope that we might eventually depart Never-Lord-of-the-Flies-Land with innocence intact and promise to nurture. Whether we decide to grow up or we wait for rescue we will emerge having conquered the process.


3 thoughts on “Dark Side of Neverland

  1. Don’t know if you want to know this or not. But you asked. When Harriet Ann died, they found drawings where she depicted herself as “in trouble” (I don’t know if she drew the devil) and her brother as an angel. She seemed to feel that she could not keep up. Of course, everyone was crushed to find out then that she felt that way about herself. And the generation before that, Aunt Charlotte used to call Uncle Arlyn “Ever Right” for the same reasons. (Wanna bet one or two of your sibs are envious of you, just a bit?)

    Your dad was a wonderful person and role model. You have the best examples to pull from and already live them yourself. These are great stories that you are choosing to share. Other families just aren’t baring their souls on the internet. They are doing it with their friends. Don’t stop. It’s not TMI, it’s stuff everyone will laugh about in later years.

    Love, Cousin Amy

  2. Wow!! Beautifully written with emotions over flowing–but remember no one is perfect! Everyone struggles from time to time. I know he would tell you that and to have patience. Love you, Mom

  3. We’ve all got our stories. Most of us don’t share them simply because we can’t find the right words to make sure that people see the beauty and laughter along with the tears. Keep ’em coming. The wise words of my first pediatrician “the great ones are the most difficult to raise”

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